‘Tu’ or ‘vous’ made simple.
There are two ways to say ‘you’ in French, ‘tu’ and ‘vous’, but which one should you use and when?
‘Tu’ is singular and familiar
As well as the singular form, ‘tu’ is also the familiar form. This means that you will use it with your friends and family.
‘Vous’ is plural and formal
We use ‘vous’ to address any group of people, regardless of how familiar we are with them.
‘Tu’ is the singular form and ‘vous’ is the plural form. So, the simple answer for when to use which is, use ‘tu’ when addressing one person, and ‘vous’ when addressing more than one person.
However, - of course there’d be a ‘however’, it’s French! ;P - ‘vous’ is also used in formal and polite situations.
Read on to gain a deeper understanding of these subject pronouns, so that you don’t cause offence.
When to use ‘tu’
With colleagues you’re friendly with.
With people in your social circle, in the same age bracket, friends of friends.
With classmates.
When addressing a child you are teaching, aged about 13 or less.
Questions and sentences using ‘tu’
Aimes-tu les pâtes? - Do you like the pasta?
Quel âge as-tu? - How old are you?
Je te donne le livre. - I am giving you the book.
Et toi? - And you?
When to use ‘vous’
When addressing your boss, your teacher, your child’s teacher, your landlord, any strangers.
In any kind of professional interaction, for example with a waiter, concierge, doctor, police officer etc.
To show respect for your elders, for example helping out an elderly person in the supermarket.
Addressing your in-laws!
With any group, even if that’s a group of your friends, colleagues, a class of children.
As you can see, they rely a lot on social context.
Questions and sentences using ‘vous’
Aimez-vous Genève? - Do you like Geneva?
Je vous donne le livre. - I am giving you the book.
Je vous en prie. - You’re welcome.
Et vous? - And you?
Comment vous appelez-vous? - What’s your name?
Note that in this last question ‘vous’ appears twice. This is because it’s a reflexive verb. One translates as you and one as yourself. Literally: What do you call yourself?
A note on other adjectives and pronouns.
In the section above you will have spotted the word ‘toi’. ‘Tu’ is the subject pronoun and ‘toi’ is the stressed pronoun. For the purposes of understanding when to use ‘tu’ and ‘vous’, don’t worry too much about the different grammatical names, just know that ‘tu’ and ‘toi’ are in the same bracket in terms of when to use them.
Te, ton, ta, tes, le tien and la tienne should all be used when you would use ‘tu’ to address that person.
And likewise, votre, vos, and le/la vôtre when you would address that person using ‘vous’.
Parents, teachers and children
To clarify, if you are speaking to a child, even one you don’t know, for example you’re a ski instructor teaching a child to ski, you’ll use ‘tu’. Children will use ‘vous’ when speaking to the teacher and ‘tu’ when speaking to their classmates. They will also use ‘tu’ to address their parents, and they’ll only use ‘vous’ to if they are joking around. It used to be common to hear children use ‘vous’ towards their grandparents but now that’s considered pretty posh. Think of when people would say ‘yes, sir’ to their parents and grandparents in English!
Changing from ‘vous’ to ‘tu’
As we’ve seen already, when meeting new people as an adult (unless they are friends of friends) you’ll use ‘vous’.
Now, there comes a time when you’ll likely switch to ‘tu’. Let’s take the ski teaching example again. You’ve taught your client a few times and you are now friends as well as well as student-teacher. If they switch to ‘tu’, then you can do the same. If they don’t, you can always ask.
On peut se tutoyer? - Can we use ‘tu’ between us? This is a pretty normal question amongst adults in France. If you’re not sure if it’s the right time to ask or not, then just stick with ‘vous’ and wait for them to make the change. Again, in our ski teaching example, if you’re a male instructor teaching a woman, then wait for her to initiate the switch.
Once you switch to ‘tu’, then you won’t switch back to ‘vous’. However, remember that plural takes precedent, so if you are addressing two people together, you’ll use ‘vous’, regardless of what you use when they are on their own.
Pretty much all non-business relationships will become ‘tu’ with time, though there are a few exceptions. If there is an age difference of 20 years or so then you’re unlikely to switch unless you have a close relationship (as seen with grandchildren and grandparents). Also maybe not with your in-laws, some families never change!
Listen out for them in context
To help you get a feel for the two forms and to get used to them in context, listen out to conversations around you and note who is interacting. For example, waiting at the bus stop or in the supermarket queue, at the hotel reception or in the tourist office, at the next table in the restaurant or on the ski lift.
In summary
Use ‘tu’ when speaking to a child or a friend and ‘vous’ for an adult, stranger, or more than one person. If you’re unsure or too focused on speaking French for the first time to choose, use ‘vous’. It’s better to be too formal than informal!
Singular Plural
Informal tu vous
Formal vous vous
PS. If you’re a ski instructor learning French to pass their second language exam, this means you can focus on learning the ‘vous’ forms of the relevant verbs first as they’ll be the forms you use the most!
